I live my life, you live yours!

OMFG! Seriously?? I don't even know how I got involved in all this shit dramas!! I wish I can just lay all this truth cards out on the table and let you know I have nothing against anything people do! Baby, you were born this way! So why should I have comments on your life if I don't wanna have you commenting on my life??!! My point here is, I'm not in your shoes so I would have no idea what goes on in your operating system. But one thing I do know is, I have no grudge against you or anyone else!!! I'm not on anyone's side! I walk alone!

This is hard to say, but even YOU! OF ALL PEOPLE, YOU KNOW I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU! You're going overboard! I know the feelings of losing a friend is hard, and I know that you losing your friend is hard on you but you're making it hard on me too! You're not the person I once knew, sometimes, I don't get why you're so hard on her?? She may not be as matured thinking as you are, but she have her own wings to fly, I honestly have to say, why don't you just leave her alone and let her make her own decision doesn't matter if it turns into regrets or happiness!! Its her life, its her choice, you can give advice, but after advice you turn around and stab her in the back by saying she's getting further away from you and that your friendship is deteriorating. I know that through it all, things are hard, but if you wouldn't have so much comment on people life, and just let things be, things may just turn out fine.

People falls in and out of love all the time. When you're in it, it just feels like heaven, you don't give a shit about the surrounding and all you wanna do is just be with that person every second. No offence, but you won't know how that feels, so you have no rights to give judgments! I'm not saying this cause I'm jealous or anything, its just my point of view. From what i can see, you are the rocks blocking the waters from flowing down to infinity! so why don't you just move aside, mind your own business, and get your own life!

The world doesn't revolve around us, we revolve around it.

p.s I know I sound like a bitch commenting on people's life while telling people to not comment on my life. But I'm not commenting, I'm laying out the cards. Its up to you to take it, or leave it!

three more months

So.. today, right now, in an hour time, I'll be going for my treatment call "IT", basically, I'm going for a shot of chemotherapy. urgh, just typing it gives me the chills, but, I'm proud to say that I know god has cured me inside out and I look up to him no matter what happen.

So for those of you who doesn't know, I was diagnosed with "ALL" Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia on 9th March 2009. To put it in simple words, I had blood cancer. At first, I was like "uh...ok, what is it?" But looking at my parent's face, I know its not good. So that's how things all started. I can't recall how many times I just feeling like suffocating myself and die through all the pains of those memories. I recall every visit to the hospital, especially the ones where I had to stay there for more than a week! Imagine that! lying on the bed and just going through hell! I wonder how much tears I have shed since then, each visits to the hospital doing really painful treatment, staying overnight there, vomiting.. Great, talk about vomiting, I there was one night, from 6pm they start my chemo intravenous drip and it's suppose to last for 12-hour, wow, that was the longest 12-hour I had to ever go through. I had to get up and vomit every 10 minute, I couldn't sleep the whole night. You can start doing your maths and count the number of time I vomited that day.

Anyway, moving on, I'm really glad god sent down some angels to help me get through those days, first of all, my family, they have done nothing but be there for me everyday, every second. My dad, he's my hero! He sacrifice most of his time just sending me to the hospital, sitting there with me on that stupid ridiculously uncomfortable chair, every time I had a treatment, he'll be the one sitting there and he's the one that has been telling me what to eat and what to not eat, all in all, I couldn't have gotten through that period without him. My mum, she's my wonder woman! XD she had to work most of the time of the day, and after work, she would have to come home and clean the house, sometimes she'll drive straight to the hosp just to see me. I still remember seeing her walking in my room, I literally sigh a relieve, its like nothing beats just seeing her face. ^^ My elder sister, gosh, where do I even start, she's the one that helped me through the time where I felt like giving up the most, she'll always remind me of god's wonder and miracle which restore me the confident to keep on living through life! Not to forget, she is also my so call "therapist", nothing beats a conversation of us after a long day, we'll be laughing away about stupid stuff and just goofing around. Last but not least, my younger sister, she's better off kissing me goodnight, sometimes she don't realize this, but I love it when she just comes over and say, "I love you lang", even though I'll be like, "eww, stay away from me", she'll still hug me with that big arms of hers. ^^ Oh, not to forget my little paw-print, Jasper, he's the world most irritating, disgusting and annoying dog anyone could ever have, but isn't that why I love him!!

Oh, Of course, there is my BFF, Joelissa Noel!!!! she has helped me through most of my hard time just keeping a smile on my face, she used to be like..an emo person, and she changed cuz she know she has gotta keep that smile on her face to keep me going. I love her sooooo much!! btw, its our 5th year anniversary this year for our friendship!! We gotta beat 50 years!! haha! and my other best pal, Johnathan Cheong! Thx bro for always giving me advice on boys issues, haha, He's my best buddy since primary school and he always will be! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!! And of course there are the other that I didn't mention, sorry, its gonna bored the reader if I keep writing now. ^^ But just know deep down i really appreciate the helps and encouragements from you guys!

Alright, so fasting forward, here I am today, done the drastic part of my treatment, and I am in my remission for more than 6 months now, I pray lord you'll continue to bless me through my everyday. and now I have to go for hospital clinic check up every 2 weeks, and every 3 months I'll have to go for a shot of chemo. I only have 2 more shots to go including today's. so after today, I only have to look forward till 3 months later for my next shot...and..wow.. I wonder what's next!!! I really thank god for this!

p.s I miss you soooo much melanie yeekay kuan!!

M.K.Y.L

!peace out!